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alt_billAlice (and Charlie):
I think it's a good policy that I'm checking in with both of you every time I have to do one of the cardinals. It forces me think through my decisions and options, and it keeps me accountable. Alice, upon mulling it over, I realise there's another situation I've become enmeshed with that by rights, as the Head of the Order and my commanding officer, so to speak, you should be monitoring carefully.
Once that occurred to me, my immediate impulse was to want to hide the information from you--which makes me suspect I really need to tell you immediately. You do need to know, and it would be a very bad idea to blindside you with this.
Charlie already knows a little about this, which is why he's included on this message, too, and I trust him to keep me honest.
Right. So, then.
I reckon I'm screwing up my nerve.
I've mentioned that I've developed a source within MLE. Things have, ah, developed a little more quickly than I'd planned. Or I even intended, at least at first.
She's an Auror by the name of Rachel Lamont with the Malfeasance Elimination Unit who has been embedded with my division to do audits and investigations. Her role is to root out both corruption and traitors. House Ravenclaw. She left Hogwarts in 1990. Well regarded in her unit, and already occasionally assuming a supervisory role. Intelligent, with a sarcastic sense of humour that I rather like.
She is the one I turned to when I needed someone to coach me on how to do the curses in the first place.
We've been thrown together, in a way, since we both started in our positions at around the same time, and we office close to one another. She assisted me when Mulciber cast Cruciatus on me, and I did the same for her. She has been willing to share information with me, and she's interested in my observations concerning events at the Ministry and the people we encounter there.
We've become quite friendly together. Then, rather unexpectedly, she propositioned me. Um, intimately. You understand, I trust.
I took her up on her offer. This has reoccurred more than once.
I assure you I haven't completely lost my head. Obviously, I have done my best to observe security protocols and I remain wary around her. I have not yet accepted any food or drink from her (bringing take out curry when I visit her, for example. When I've had breakfast at her place, I've gone out to bring food in.)
Well. That's it, that's what I felt I had to report.
I should also let you know that I spoke with Mum tonight to let her know I've been forced by Mulciber to perform the cardinals, and that each time I've checked in with the two of you. I just felt I had to tell her the truth. I imagine either one of you may hear from her soon. She took it as well as could be expected, I suppose. Really, I believe she was trying rather desperately not to react in front of me.
Please let me know if you have any questions.
I think it's a good policy that I'm checking in with both of you every time I have to do one of the cardinals. It forces me think through my decisions and options, and it keeps me accountable. Alice, upon mulling it over, I realise there's another situation I've become enmeshed with that by rights, as the Head of the Order and my commanding officer, so to speak, you should be monitoring carefully.
Once that occurred to me, my immediate impulse was to want to hide the information from you--which makes me suspect I really need to tell you immediately. You do need to know, and it would be a very bad idea to blindside you with this.
Charlie already knows a little about this, which is why he's included on this message, too, and I trust him to keep me honest.
Right. So, then.
I reckon I'm screwing up my nerve.
I've mentioned that I've developed a source within MLE. Things have, ah, developed a little more quickly than I'd planned. Or I even intended, at least at first.
She's an Auror by the name of Rachel Lamont with the Malfeasance Elimination Unit who has been embedded with my division to do audits and investigations. Her role is to root out both corruption and traitors. House Ravenclaw. She left Hogwarts in 1990. Well regarded in her unit, and already occasionally assuming a supervisory role. Intelligent, with a sarcastic sense of humour that I rather like.
She is the one I turned to when I needed someone to coach me on how to do the curses in the first place.
We've been thrown together, in a way, since we both started in our positions at around the same time, and we office close to one another. She assisted me when Mulciber cast Cruciatus on me, and I did the same for her. She has been willing to share information with me, and she's interested in my observations concerning events at the Ministry and the people we encounter there.
We've become quite friendly together. Then, rather unexpectedly, she propositioned me. Um, intimately. You understand, I trust.
I took her up on her offer. This has reoccurred more than once.
I assure you I haven't completely lost my head. Obviously, I have done my best to observe security protocols and I remain wary around her. I have not yet accepted any food or drink from her (bringing take out curry when I visit her, for example. When I've had breakfast at her place, I've gone out to bring food in.)
Well. That's it, that's what I felt I had to report.
I should also let you know that I spoke with Mum tonight to let her know I've been forced by Mulciber to perform the cardinals, and that each time I've checked in with the two of you. I just felt I had to tell her the truth. I imagine either one of you may hear from her soon. She took it as well as could be expected, I suppose. Really, I believe she was trying rather desperately not to react in front of me.
Please let me know if you have any questions.
Re: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-09-19 03:25 pm (UTC)But if you are being affected by Dark magic, well, keeping you away from somebody you're starting to care for isn't exactly the best way to go about keeping you okay. And we really don't have anybody else who can get even a little bit of insight into the Aurors.
Re: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-09-19 04:20 pm (UTC)And with her, it can use my wish to be no longer being lonely.
Either way, Terry told me, it can lead you step by step--with every forward movement feeling sensible and well-considered--to the worst possible outcome, the one that'll hurt you the most. Eventually, the one that'll destroy you.
I'm starting to see how wicked clever the Arts are at trapping people. If that's really what's going on.
Of course, maybe it isn't the Arts at all. Maybe I became involved with her because I'm simply the world's biggest idiot.
All right, I hate this, but I'm still glad I told Alice.
Well, not happy glad. But thankful.
Re: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-09-19 10:54 pm (UTC)Lucius Malfoy stopped by the Division today. I was on my way to Rachel's office, but I caught a glimpse of him, so I stepped back quickly just behind a corner. He disappeared in her office. A few minutes later he headed out again without stopping to speak with anyone else, and then another minute, she left, too. I tried to catch her, but she brushed me off, something about being on her way to a meeting.
They have been private messaging. Just yesterday was the last. She takes off a couple hours early every Thursday afternoon. And the last time I went to her flat, there was a brand new acquisition: a very expensive tapestry mounted on an easel. Didn't fit with anything in the flat; obviously way over her usual budget.
I am an idiot. Her other lover is Lucius Malfoy.
Re: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-09-19 10:57 pm (UTC)As opposed to the ginger quill-pusher with goat shite on his boots.
Re: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-09-19 11:00 pm (UTC)It'll be perfectly easy. She'll break up with me.
Re: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-09-19 11:04 pm (UTC)Re: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-09-20 12:23 am (UTC)I'm sorry it all went to shite. I wish it hadn't.
And you're worth ten of that arsehole.
Re: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-09-20 02:15 am (UTC)He's still the one who ends up with everything, so I imagine he doesn't give a toss.