Yeah, Dolohov announced it at breakfast. He looked exhausted, but mighty pleased. Huge cheer went up, and the Hufflepuffs are starting to perk up a bit.
What about the rest of that awful woman's apparatus of bureaucracy? Is that committee of her spies still in operation? They must be at a bit of a loss...all these owl posts to open, and no one to report to. Has there been any announcement about that? And surely there isn't anyone else in the administration at Hogwarts who will come down on students like a tonne of falling cauldrons if they use private messages in their posts?
I'd like to write to Ron and Ginny again, with at least a smidgen of privacy.
No. Everyone's sort of waiting to hear if there will be an interim Headmaster or Headmistress. Most are hoping for the return of Professor McGonagall, of course!
Not too much, yet. There still seems to be some wrangling on the Board of Governors, but then, isn't there always? I think everyone's waiting to see if there is any statement or reaction from the Lord Protector.
But I can tell you this, that Umbridge's obituary will be published in the Prophet tomorrow. Nobody's planning on looking for her very hard, apparently.
And yeah, we're really happy about Cedric Diggory. Dunno what this will mean for that recruiting call he had from the Cannons. We'd also beat around the idea of sharing space as we each investigate possible business ventures, but of course everything was all up in the air until after we'd left school. George and me had even talked about whether he might be a good future recruit for the Order.
With this injury, I wonder if this'll mean his NEWTs will have to be put off for awhile. It's not quite clear what the long-term effect will be, although clearly he was hurt pretty bad.
For one thing, there's still this weird reluctance to use one journal, the way we have for years. I use a lot more sentences starting with 'I' instead of 'we' than I used to do.
Brutka has been working with us, including using legilimancy. Doing it with Snape used to just give me headaches, but Brutka has a more sort of restrained touch. (Odd to think I'm becoming a connoisseur of different styles of legilimancy.)
Yeah. Not quite normal yet. Whenever I catch a glimpse of George from the corner of my eye, I still think, 'who brought a mirror in here?' instead of 'that's my twin.' Very odd. Brain still feels fuzzy, and math calculations are still not as quick as they used to be. But Lee thinks I am getting better.
Well, we didn't plan it, exactly, but we've been calling her the Pink Toad for weeks now. So I guess it was just at the forefront of our minds.
Once I did the spell though, and she was sitting there, frozen on the floor--and blimey, was she ever surprised--I will have to admit that I gripped my wand real tight for a moment there. Thinking of all the other things I could do to her.
It was Dad, I think. All those talks out in the ruddy goat shed were good for something, I reckon. You know, how he used to go on about ethics, and choices, and not becoming like the people you hate?
Merlin. Reading your questions gave me such a jolt in the gut. Who the fuck am I to approve or disapprove of what Poppy does? Except, of course, I still don't approve of her using that potion for Dolohov. Except what if her doing that was the thing that started off this whole train of connections? From what Poppy said, her and Dolohov working together were probably the only people who could've saved Diggory, and if she hadn't saved Dolohov's life and hadn't shown him that she had the potion and hadn't made him think she had more, Dolohov wouldn't have brought Diggory to her and Diggory wouldn't have made it.
Is one alive Death Eater a fitting trade for one alive boy with his whole life ahead of him? Is there a ledger somewhere? Is there some heavenly accountant sitting around with a quill somewhere, taking notes and totting up on his or her fingers? And if there is, how many more lives is Dolohov in the red?
I don't know. Can we think like that? Can we not? Is it possible for actions to redeem someone -- and if so, who decides when they do, and who's the one to draw a line and decide, and if not, why would anyone ever change their minds and come to our side?
Who decides? Who has to live with making those choices?
The more I think about it, the more I almost envy Poppy. I know I was upset at her before, but -- at least she has rules to follow. 'If someone's hurt, heal them.' That's nice and simple.
On a brighter note, the reason I've been quiet for a few days: Maggie's eggs have been hatching. One male yesterday morning, one female yesterday evening, and the third kit's still being stubborn; we're probably going to have to crack it ourselves if it hasn't got with the program by mid-morning or so.
And they all took a vote up here, the sneaks, with me being none the wiser, and you know what they decided?
I don't know, either. IS it possible for actions to redeem someone? (God, I hope so, or I can kiss goodbye my hopes of ever having any kind of relationship with Ron ever again.)
I remember what Dumbledore told me, that remorse is how you heal the damage caused by dark magic. Maybe Dolohov regrets some of his murders? And this was a way, perhaps to atone? (Of course, I'll admit I don't know; I could be COMPLETELY wrong. Maybe he still would have no trouble at all killing people like Gideon or Fabian, people who are fighting against him, but that he's just reluctant to see an innocent student under his care die.)
I remember something that Sirius said to me in a private conversation once, that the real world isn't split into black and white. It would be nice if it were (and yeah, if we all had easy rules to follow, like Poppy), but it isn't.
I guess that's what Dad was thinking, watching Percy: don't be an idiot, but give each person every chance you can. Be careful, but be compassionate, too, because any person might actually find a way to stumble back out of the darkness, if they want to badly enough.
We just don't know if Percy or Dolohov want to come back. And Dolohov, of course, if he wants to come back, has much further to go.
And on the question of who decides: well. We are only each responsible for our own decisions, when it comes right down to it.
I'm glad that you gave the dragon blood to Poppy. I'm glad that it resulted in at least one life clearly worth saving.
Congratulations on Maggie's brood. And, oh, how I laughed at the idea that Dad's first namesake should be a dragon. Not a grandson, but a dragon. Of course. You know, sometimes I daydream that if we ever manage to throw off the yoke of this cursed Protectorate, Dad's heroism will be known to everybody. Schools and parks and Ministry buildings might be named after him someday, but until then, we'll console ourselves with a fine young dragon carrying the name forward. Now there's a fitting legacy!
I hope Art will have a long and blessed life. If he lives up to his namesake, it'll surely be a remarkable one.
I know. I'm going to tell Mum when I figure out how to put it, and I hope she finds it as nift as I do. He's a damn fine dragon, too. Healthiest hatchling we've had for years, and he's already trying to figure out what those wing things are good for.
I like the idea of Dad's name being on schools and parks and the like. Things that build things, yeah? Not the same as having him, but ... it feels right, somehow.
I keep flipping back and forth between the idea that you have to give people room to make different choices, to become a different person, even after they've done horrible things. Or else none of this means anything. And, I mean, people like Snape and Macnair did make different choices, right? They've both done horrible things, and at some point they must have believed in what Voldemort was selling, and now they're on our side.
But then I think: okay, so, even if you're sorry for it, even if you're working to make things better, does that mean all the horrible things you did just go away?
And that always brings me to -- what happens if when we win? There's going to be a load of people who never really did anything horribly awful themselves, but helped other people do horrible things. Or people who did horrible things, but only because it was that or have horrible things done to them. What are we going to do there? Who's going to make those choices when we get there?
I don't know.
I do hope Percy realises how far he's gone. And I do hope he decides to walk back from where he's headed. I just hope it's before he does anything that's too far along, and I'm horribly afraid it won't be, and then somebody's going to have to make that kind of decision about him.
But, thanks. Reading this made me feel better about the dragon's blood, a little. Because even if something I did helped to save the life of somebody as evil as Dolohov, it also helped to save Diggory. And even if it hadn't, even if it had just been Dolohov, that's my choice, just like it was Dad's choice to save Selwyn, and I want to live in the world where we work to save lives, not to end them.
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branchandroot
Order Only
Date: 2013-04-29 06:25 pm (UTC)Re: Order Only
Date: 2013-04-29 06:30 pm (UTC)Re: Order Only
Date: 2013-04-29 11:37 pm (UTC)(We put the toad in pink robes, by the way. I'm sure she'll get slime all over them.)
Re: Order Only
Date: 2013-04-29 11:39 pm (UTC)Re: Order Only
Date: 2013-04-29 11:40 pm (UTC)Re: Order Only
Date: 2013-04-29 11:43 pm (UTC)I'd like to write to Ron and Ginny again, with at least a smidgen of privacy.
Re: Order Only
Date: 2013-04-29 11:45 pm (UTC)Heard anything at the Ministry?
Re: Order Only
Date: 2013-04-29 11:49 pm (UTC)But I can tell you this, that Umbridge's obituary will be published in the Prophet tomorrow. Nobody's planning on looking for her very hard, apparently.
Re: Order Only
Date: 2013-04-30 12:06 am (UTC)With this injury, I wonder if this'll mean his NEWTs will have to be put off for awhile. It's not quite clear what the long-term effect will be, although clearly he was hurt pretty bad.
Poor bloke.
Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:25 am (UTC)Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:30 am (UTC)For one thing, there's still this weird reluctance to use one journal, the way we have for years. I use a lot more sentences starting with 'I' instead of 'we' than I used to do.
Brutka has been working with us, including using legilimancy. Doing it with Snape used to just give me headaches, but Brutka has a more sort of restrained touch. (Odd to think I'm becoming a connoisseur of different styles of legilimancy.)
Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:33 am (UTC)Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:35 am (UTC)Were you tempted to use something worse?
Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:38 am (UTC)Once I did the spell though, and she was sitting there, frozen on the floor--and blimey, was she ever surprised--I will have to admit that I gripped my wand real tight for a moment there. Thinking of all the other things I could do to her.
Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:39 am (UTC)I did, too.
Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:40 am (UTC)Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:43 am (UTC)It was Dad, I think. All those talks out in the ruddy goat shed were good for something, I reckon. You know, how he used to go on about ethics, and choices, and not becoming like the people you hate?
Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:45 am (UTC)I remember those talks, too.
Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:46 am (UTC)Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:47 am (UTC)Well done, gents. Really.
If Dad knew...and maybe he does, somewhere...I expect he would say the same.
Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:58 am (UTC)Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 02:58 am (UTC)Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 03:00 am (UTC)Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 03:02 am (UTC)Ouch.
Best not mention it to Mum.
Re: Order Only: Private message to Fred Weasley and George Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 03:02 am (UTC)Re: Order Only: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 12:12 am (UTC)You ARE okay with it, aren't you? Even if it didn't go to an Order member?
Re: Order Only: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 09:18 am (UTC)Is one alive Death Eater a fitting trade for one alive boy with his whole life ahead of him? Is there a ledger somewhere? Is there some heavenly accountant sitting around with a quill somewhere, taking notes and totting up on his or her fingers? And if there is, how many more lives is Dolohov in the red?
I don't know. Can we think like that? Can we not? Is it possible for actions to redeem someone -- and if so, who decides when they do, and who's the one to draw a line and decide, and if not, why would anyone ever change their minds and come to our side?
Who decides? Who has to live with making those choices?
The more I think about it, the more I almost envy Poppy. I know I was upset at her before, but -- at least she has rules to follow. 'If someone's hurt, heal them.' That's nice and simple.
On a brighter note, the reason I've been quiet for a few days: Maggie's eggs have been hatching. One male yesterday morning, one female yesterday evening, and the third kit's still being stubborn; we're probably going to have to crack it ourselves if it hasn't got with the program by mid-morning or so.
And they all took a vote up here, the sneaks, with me being none the wiser, and you know what they decided?
They've named the male Art.
Re: Order Only: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 04:56 pm (UTC)I remember what Dumbledore told me, that remorse is how you heal the damage caused by dark magic. Maybe Dolohov regrets some of his murders? And this was a way, perhaps to atone? (Of course, I'll admit I don't know; I could be COMPLETELY wrong. Maybe he still would have no trouble at all killing people like Gideon or Fabian, people who are fighting against him, but that he's just reluctant to see an innocent student under his care die.)
I remember something that Sirius said to me in a private conversation once, that the real world isn't split into black and white. It would be nice if it were (and yeah, if we all had easy rules to follow, like Poppy), but it isn't.
I guess that's what Dad was thinking, watching Percy: don't be an idiot, but give each person every chance you can. Be careful, but be compassionate, too, because any person might actually find a way to stumble back out of the darkness, if they want to badly enough.
We just don't know if Percy or Dolohov want to come back. And Dolohov, of course, if he wants to come back, has much further to go.
And on the question of who decides: well. We are only each responsible for our own decisions, when it comes right down to it.
I'm glad that you gave the dragon blood to Poppy. I'm glad that it resulted in at least one life clearly worth saving.
Congratulations on Maggie's brood. And, oh, how I laughed at the idea that Dad's first namesake should be a dragon. Not a grandson, but a dragon. Of course. You know, sometimes I daydream that if we ever manage to throw off the yoke of this cursed Protectorate, Dad's heroism will be known to everybody. Schools and parks and Ministry buildings might be named after him someday, but until then, we'll console ourselves with a fine young dragon carrying the name forward. Now there's a fitting legacy!
I hope Art will have a long and blessed life. If he lives up to his namesake, it'll surely be a remarkable one.
Re: Order Only: Private message to Charlie Weasley
Date: 2013-04-30 07:43 pm (UTC)I like the idea of Dad's name being on schools and parks and the like. Things that build things, yeah? Not the same as having him, but ... it feels right, somehow.
I keep flipping back and forth between the idea that you have to give people room to make different choices, to become a different person, even after they've done horrible things. Or else none of this means anything. And, I mean, people like Snape and Macnair did make different choices, right? They've both done horrible things, and at some point they must have believed in what Voldemort was selling, and now they're on our side.
But then I think: okay, so, even if you're sorry for it, even if you're working to make things better, does that mean all the horrible things you did just go away?
And that always brings me to -- what happens
ifwhen we win? There's going to be a load of people who never really did anything horribly awful themselves, but helped other people do horrible things. Or people who did horrible things, but only because it was that or have horrible things done to them. What are we going to do there? Who's going to make those choices when we get there?I don't know.
I do hope Percy realises how far he's gone. And I do hope he decides to walk back from where he's headed. I just hope it's before he does anything that's too far along, and I'm horribly afraid it won't be, and then somebody's going to have to make that kind of decision about him.
But, thanks. Reading this made me feel better about the dragon's blood, a little. Because even if something I did helped to save the life of somebody as evil as Dolohov, it also helped to save Diggory. And even if it hadn't, even if it had just been Dolohov, that's my choice, just like it was Dad's choice to save Selwyn, and I want to live in the world where we work to save lives, not to end them.