Order Only: Thanks
Dec. 29th, 2012 10:58 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
alt_billI'm better now.
Couldn't sleep last night until 4:30 am, but then Charlie and I managed to kip until the rooster woke us up at dawn. Staggered into the house, where Mum made us breakfast, and then I went to bed and slept like a rock until this evening.
So my days and nights are turned around, but the inside of my brain feels much more familiar. If still a bit soggy. Which is a huge relief.
Charlie extracted a copy of the memory last night as soon as I returned. Two versions: the whole thing, and then just an excerpt showing the view of the night sky at the beginning and the end. I hope we can borrow Dumbledore's pensieve at the Order meeting for anyone...anyonemad enough willing to view it, who thinks they might be able to shed any light on what this has to do with the wards.
I'm a bit stumped about what to do with the astronomical portion, though. We need to find an expert who can intrepret it accurately enough to pinpoint the site. And I'm firmly of the mind that we need to find that site. As much as I dread the thought of going back there to confirm the location. If we could do tests of the soil to help identify the, uh, fluids that were spilled, and examine any lingering magical signatures, that might be really crucial information.
Couldn't sleep last night until 4:30 am, but then Charlie and I managed to kip until the rooster woke us up at dawn. Staggered into the house, where Mum made us breakfast, and then I went to bed and slept like a rock until this evening.
So my days and nights are turned around, but the inside of my brain feels much more familiar. If still a bit soggy. Which is a huge relief.
Charlie extracted a copy of the memory last night as soon as I returned. Two versions: the whole thing, and then just an excerpt showing the view of the night sky at the beginning and the end. I hope we can borrow Dumbledore's pensieve at the Order meeting for anyone...anyone
I'm a bit stumped about what to do with the astronomical portion, though. We need to find an expert who can intrepret it accurately enough to pinpoint the site. And I'm firmly of the mind that we need to find that site. As much as I dread the thought of going back there to confirm the location. If we could do tests of the soil to help identify the, uh, fluids that were spilled, and examine any lingering magical signatures, that might be really crucial information.
Re: Private message to Frank Longbottom
Date: 2012-12-30 04:16 pm (UTC)the thing about your dad was that it wasn't
he was supposed to be low risk. for a damn good reason. he wasn't supposed to be in the line of fire. and when the fire came to him, it was something none of us could've planned for. ben and emmy, they went to ireland knowing full well what could happen.
guess what I'm trying to say is it's fucking terrifying when something like that happens when it isn't supposed to. when it's someone who needs to be safe. when it's something we can't control.
I'll make sure to bring up safety protocols at the next meeting. we do drills once a month at moddey, evacuation drills and the like. maybe we can set up a few scenario drills order wide just to test the system, make sure everyone knows their options and has a plan. maybe that'll help.
and wanting to get a bit numb and not remember things for a little while is part of it. it can just get out of hand, is all. when it turns into a habit you can't shake, and there's nothing else that'll do the trick.
Re: Private message to Frank Longbottom
Date: 2012-12-30 05:59 pm (UTC)I think I might want to increase our wards on the Burrow, too. Just for my own peace of mind.
Trying to get numb...yes. That seemed awfully appealing this week. In fact, Poppy's potion, despite the reason I took it, felt almost like a relief, right when I downed the dose. It did make it seem as if nothing mattered.
Maybe that's why coming off of it was so difficult. I was an absolute beast to Charlie during the withdrawal.
I just didn't want to come back.
However, I don't intend to take it again. Don't want to start down that road, either. I'm going to have to figure this out, how to pick myself and go on without any props or crutches. Somehow.
Oh, Frank, I just miss him so much. I talked to him almost every day, had lunch with him several times a week. And I always came back every Sunday night for dinner. He was my sounding board, my confidante, my, well, my father confessor. Literally. I talked to him more than I talked with anyone. I know Mum's feeling the same way; it's just an ache, because you keep reaching out for him, and he's not there.